You may remember back when I was pregnant with Anissa, I wrote a blog post about Pregnancy Fears, and every worry that was taking up space in my mind (ok, not every worry- as a first time mom, that list would have been unimaginably long).
So, now that I’ve been there, done that, are all my worries and fears for Baby No. 2 gone? Heck no! It’s just that they are different this time, knowing what I know.
So, I thought it would be fun to compare and contrast (can you tell I teach Language Arts?) my pregnancy fears from Round 1 and Round 2.
1st Pregnancy Fear: Having a preemie
And not even just a preemie, but a micro-preemie. I have no idea why this was topping my list of fears the first time around, but it did! Luckily, she was not born until 38w2d, so no micro-preemie or preemie business going on here!
2nd Pregnancy Fear: Having the same post-partum experience as last time
Now, my sights aren’t as set on WHEN the baby will come (heck, any time after 37weeks is GREAT with me!) Instead, this time I’m getting really nervous about the post-partum experience, and hoping and praying it doesn’t go down like last time. In case you forgot, you can read about that ordeal here, but basically, I ended up being in the hospital 4 times, having 2 surgeries, and hundreds of blood tests and mis-diagnoses. In fact, I had to leave my job and my health wasn’t completely resolved until Anissa was about 6 months old. So yeah, I’m getting nervous about that aspect, but luckily my doctors and the hospital have been so great about monitoring me and classifying me as high-risk, so that everyone will know I’m coming and be prepared for a safe, smooth delivery when the time comes 🙂
1st Pregnancy Fear: We won’t be ready in time
This was a big concern the first time around since we were remodeling and I really was afraid we’d have a preemie, but this time, I’m not too concerned about being “ready”. I know now that there are really only a few must-haves that need to be done (bed/crib/bassinet, bottles, breast-pump, diapers- and even those, they give you at the hospital!) so I’m less worried about that and more worried about…
2nd Pregnancy Fear: Having a Winter Baby
Yes, having a winter baby! Anissa was born in April, so we didn’t have to worry too much about keeping her super warm or keeping her indoors. But with Little Man on the way, he’ll be born right in the middle of what’s supposed to be a really rough winter. Usually “really rough winter” in Atlanta means we are snowed in and the city shuts down for at least a week, so imagining a week of no relief with a newborn and a toddler seems extra daunting. Plus, there HAVE been women to have babies on the side of the highway during a rough Atlanta winter, and so help me God, I will NOT give birth in a car!!
1st Pregnancy Fear: My baby won’t want/need me as much as I want/need her
This one is probably the most unwarranted fear. It all stemmed from a dream where all I wanted to do was love and smother the baby, and she somehow morphed from newborn to toddler who was pushing me away and wanting to be independent. So during my first pregnancy, I was always thinking: what if my baby doesn’t want my love and affection as much as I want hers? I wanted a needy baby! HA HA HAAAA….
2nd Pregnancy Fear: There won’t be enough of me for TWO needy babies
So, I was TOTALLY wrong about this one the first time around. Anissa NEEDS and WANTS me so so much- and believe me, I love it! But thinking about having two babies that need me and want me that much is now a much more realistic fear than thinking my baby won’t want me. I actually think this is an absurd fear, now that I think of it. I have never met a baby who doesn’t want/love/need his or her mommy more than anyone else in the world. 🙂
Anyway, there you have it! All (ok, let’s be honest, SOME) of my fears laid out for you! I’ll update you all post-baby to see what I was wrong and right about.